Your Inner Strength

A few months ago, I entered the darkest time of my life. This was before the pandemic, and had been building for a while but I hadn't realized it was coming. I don't want or need to go into details, for while the finer points are unique to me, the overall situation is universal: we enter the Darkness and face our deepest self. We face our mortality, what we care most about, and who we truly are in the network of our community. 

In the midst of this I encountered a defining moment. I felt and connected to a glowing energy deep in my core that said, "No matter what, this is your Strength. This is part of your True Self, deep, directly connected to God/Spirit. Center in this space and all is well."

Imagine you have a cave system, like a cenote that goes deep into the earth. Now imagine it is seen as the ancestors no doubt regarded these seemingly endless cave systems - a cenote that ties into the Spirit realms. That is how this space feels. Deeper than Spacetime. Accessible through my core. Strong, warm, whole. Unconditional.

I go here to meditate, to sit in the space that says: Be Still, and Know that I am Here. It's a space to inhabit when I'm feeling afraid, or getting triggered. For part of this phase of life is that I am being shown the trauma of my past and helped to release it. I need that deep, unconditional Presence to help me through. It does help, for it shows me the bigger energy of unfolding and lets me know I will be okay, although I don't know really what "okay" means anymore.

Have you found this space in you? If you get quiet, deeply still, and open to your core, what do you find? It is Joy, Light, Strength, Solid Authenticity, Your Soul.  Can you inhabit it? It will get you through anything. What if we were all able to center in this True Self and relate to others through this lens? Can you imagine a world like that? I believe miracles come from there, for it is our conscious connection with Creation, Christ, the Creator, Spirit, the Goddess. It's also how we relate to others' true selves, which many people are unable to do. We're all so wrapped up in our fears, projections, and avoiding vulnerability at all costs.

I invite you to enter the cenote with me.

I hold a vision of a world where we See each other's Strength and Truth in all we do.

So mote it be.

She Thought He was the Gardener

According to John 20, Mary Magdalene didn't recognize Jesus when she first saw him return to his empty tomb. She mistook him for the gardener. Why did he look different? Much of this story is metaphor, but not all. We are left over 2000 years later to figure out what is most likely historical and what is a metaphor. Both interpretations teach us about the nature of reality and also of Christ.

I am sitting with two questions about this story. Why a gardener? In Hebrew it means the same thing it does today. And why do we not hear of Him related to as the Gardener more? Potter, carpenter, bridegroom, shepherd. But not gardener! Yet this is in many ways what He is: One who tends His world. Who follows the seasons of death, Resurrection, and New Life. Of Hope and Faith and Promise. That's what we gardeners do. One can be all those things, but I think the gardener aspect is intriguing and powerful, especially at Easter.

My other question is why did Mary not recognize him? Why -- when He had the power to look like or be literally anything, was he unrecognizable? What had he been up to in the time he cast off his shroud and the napkin on his face? Did he watch the sunrise and take in his own Body of Light? What was he thinking?

So then she "turns around" twice. Is this literal, as anyone would when her best friend has just been brutally murdered and then his tomb is empty? Or is this more like a "turning around" that is happening in her mind, like shifting her thinking, as in, woah, all these things he's been telling me are real, and he has triumphed over death? In some way it helps to prepare her for His speaking to her.

So he calls out her name, "Mary!" and then she knows it is He. What was his tone? Loving? A whisper of hope and wonder? Exasperation because she could not see it was he? But then he apparently didn't look like Himself. Then he says don't touch me. She wanted to hug him, no doubt. Did he say this because his new Light Body was too "hot" to touch? Too incorporeal? Or some other reason? I suppose because she can't touch him. He's between the worlds. And yet he does very physical if miraculous things over the next few days, breaking bread with his frightened disciples and filling their fishing nets with a huge catch.

It's a powerful few days in the history of the planet. Over 2000 years later, we are still called to Rise and share the Light with others. In my theology this has nothing to do with "saving" someone from sin, but from guiding our souls into the Darkness of transmutation and into the Light of Awakening. We can be pulled from the sludge of our own internal Hells. Perhaps there is a Gardener in you that is as yet unrecognizable. What parts of you are you watering, germinating, and dreaming about?

Fear of the Darkness

Some seeds need light to germinate; others require darkness. At different points of our lives we have our own different needs. Usually we don't ask for or want the times of darkness, for we are afraid to falter. Afraid of getting lost. Afraid of what we cannot see.

When I taught outdoor education, we took the kids on a Night Hike. At one point we turned off the flashlights, stepped off the trail (we were all holding a rope), and sat in the dark forest. At first I felt discomfort. A sense of being unsure, wary. But then a sensation came over me: I felt cradled, held. I felt, in this utter darkness, seen. The forest saw me. The darkness saw me. In the darkness, I had nothing to prove and no one to be. It was just me and the velvety soft Love of Being.

In this time of germination, as our whole world asks who we are called to become, I wonder how the darkness can guide us. I do not relate to darkness as evil, but as a space for transmutation. Are we seeds that need the dark rich soil to transform? Can we trust the rope that keeps us connected to each other?

We sit in the Wisdom of where Christ guides us, not knowing where we are going. Not knowing who we will become. When he transitioned into a Being of Light destined to guide us, did He know? He knows now, but in this time of crucifixion and Easter, I have no sense at all. But then it isn't about me. It is about knowing that we are seen and held in the Darkness and the Light, and opening my heart to what He calls me to, even though I do not know what that is. Am I germinating or entering the cave of closing doors? I will not know until this time of life passes. 

Much love to you.

Stew and Salad for the Start of Advent

For a nourishing yet simple winter dinner as we head into Advent, use cheap root vegetables and a balance of lentils and grains to make a soup and salad for a cold night. Soup and sea salt nourish our yin, while roots ground us.


Winter Salad

Big bunch of hearty, dark leafy greens
Roast veggies
Pumpkin Seeds
Tahini Dressing

To roast veggies, cube any root veggies, some onion, stems of broccoli - anything you have on hand. Toss with olive oil, sea salt, and rosemary. Roast at 400 F for 45-60 minutes, tossing occasionally. Let cool to room temp, then top your cut leafy greens. To make the dressing, mix 1/3 cup tahini and 1/4 cup water with a teaspoon of salt and a dash of garlic powder in a blender.


Advent Stew
1/2 med onion
3 cloves garlic
1 cup lentils
1 cup quinoa, brown rice, or wild rice
6-8 cups bone broth or veggie broth
2 tablespoons tamari
sea salt to taste
chives, parsley, or another snippet of fresh greenery for the top

Cut the onion fine and saute in olive oil for about 7 minutes on medium heat. Crush or mince the garlic clove, and cook for 30 seconds with the onion. Pour the lentils in, and add the broth and tamari. Cook for about 20 minutes, then add your grain. Cook for 45 minutes or so, adding water as needed, and adjusting the salt. Pour into bowls and top with a tablespoon each of chopped greens.

November 30 - Grounding

In Living Earth Devotional I discuss grounding by imagining your body's energetic roots growing deep int the earth. I am leading a Bible study at The Land, an ecumenical Christian faith community in Aurora, Colorado. This is leading me to look up Bible verses, something that hasn't been a huge part of my faith until now. I'm actually loving seeing how Bible scripture supports my mystical, liberal, deeply ecumenical spirituality. It's beautiful to read the Bible from a Christ Consciousness perspective. So let's see what the Good Book has to say about roots and grounding.

Ephesians 3:17
so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love...

"Christ" to me is Christ Consciousness or the Cosmic Christ, which can be found in all of us, and is awaking in all of us. And the nature of Christ Consciousness and the Universe is Love. So this passage speaks about how being grounded, or putting your roots deep into the Earth, is about reaching ourselves into Love. We are established on Earth through Love. 
 
                                  ~~~

Colossians 2:6-7  Therefore, just as you have received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to walk in Him, rooted and built up in Him, established in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness. 

When we are rooted in the blessings of this life, and in the bigger picture of Christ, we overflow with gratitude. 

                                  ~~~~

Matthew 15:3 But He answered and said, "Every plant which My heavenly Father did not plant shall be uprooted."

Jesus speaks in parables about the Earth a lot. This passage is usually interpreted as people who aren't good Christians will... I'm not sure - go to "hell"? I don't see it this way, for God planted us all, and planted all the plants, "planted" everything. So what is Jesus saying here? I think he is saying that the darkness that we carry within, the belief that we are no good or that we are not loved (what hell truly is) - those beliefs were not planted by God, and those will eventually perish when we come to know that we are also Christed ones. 


Blessed be!

Study on Creation Spirituality at The Land, Week 4

At the study I am leading at The Land, a church without walls in Aurora, Colorado, we focused this week on chapter 4. Here are my notes from class.

Cosmology, Liberation & Wisdom

Fox makes the case that these are all aspects of the unified God, expressed in different ways, and with which we can participate.

Trinity: Creator (God)

“God the Creator is the Heart behind the heart that is opened by awe and by suffering to infinite compassion.” – p57

God is an artist.

Liberator (Jesus)

Richard Rohr - : “Jesus is a map for the time-bound and personal level of life; Christ is the blueprint for all time and space and life itself.” https://cac.org/another-name-for-every-thing-2019-02-12/

“Before the world was made, we have been chosen in Christ . . . claimed as God’s own and chosen from the very beginning . . . so that God could bring everything together under the headship of Christ” (Ephesians 1:3, 10, 11)

What is Jesus liberating us from? If not from sin – in the theology of original blessing – then from the darkness discussed in the Beatitudes. P60-61

Jesus is a guide, a prophet, who shows us how to live, how to evolve closer to God.

Luke 4:18 18 "The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me, because He has anointed Me to preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives And recovery of sight to the blind, To set at liberty those who are oppressed;

Wisdom/Sophia/Inspiration (Holy Spirit)

Grace of Wisdom

The grace of Wisdom also expresses itself through the experience of personal revelation. The grace of Wisdom comes to everyone, not only to highly evolved souls with big followings. Wisdom dictates that the more you are seen, the less noise you should make.

Wisdom is the choice that recognizes pain and suffering as part of the human experience. It is inevitable that we will cause each other to suffer in some way. It is wise to recognize yourself in everyone else. Seek the wise response in all events in your life. – Carolyn Myss https://www.myss.com/the-seven-graces-knowledge-2/

Proverbs 3:18 Wisdom is a tree of life to those who embrace her; happy are those who hold her tightly.

An undivided unity; the feminine face of God

From the word “womb” (rehem) comes the verb “to have compassion” (raham).

– Deuteronomy 32:18 You neglected the Rock who begot you, And forgot the God who gave you birth.

Closing prayer: Thank you God, for guiding us to understand your great mystery a little better, to grapple together with these deep questions, to not assume we know you, but to help us be open to what you reveal to us. Help us to bring wisdom into our own lives and into this community to live ever whole and closer to our divine selves.

Study on Creation Spirituality at The Land: Class Three

I've recently found a faith community called The Land,  a Methodist-based outdoor church dedicated to social justice and the Earth.

I have been leading the morning study using Matthew Fox's book Creation Spirituality: Liberating Gifts for the Peoples of the Earth. I am sharing the class curriculum plus a few notes here. Read class one here. Class two can be found here.

Here is class three.

Creation Spirituality at The Land, Class Three

Week 3

Chapters 2-3: Focusing on Compassion, Creativity, and Beauty

Compassion

“Compassion is the moral law of interconnectivity, the cosmic law of responding to another’s pain and suffering as well as to another’s joy and celebration.” P 45 (all page numbers are from Matthew Fox's  Creation Spirituality: Liberating Gifts for the Peoples of the Earth.

This is what the Lord Almighty said: ‘Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another. Do not oppress the widow or the fatherless, the foreigner or the poor. Do not plot evil against each other.’

Zechariah 7:9-10 | NIV

Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you;
therefore he will rise up to show you compassion.
For the Lord is a God of justice.
Blessed are all who wait for him!

Isaiah 30:18 | NIV

Compassion is not sentimentalizing, or pity. It requires feeling with – which makes us face our intensity tolerance. I shared the story of when I was studying at Creation Spirituality University and took a class on compassion. For our final paper we had to write on an act of compassion we would like to serve. How I wrote about helping a friend who had just had a baby and treating a schizophrenic homeless woman as a human being. And how I failed. What I didn't understand then was that I was still thinking of me and them, not us, not suffering with. 

We discussed compassion, and one of the class members shared brain studies on how compassion is contagious. 

Creativity

“Birthing, begetting, dying, and being born – all this happens to stars and planets, to galaxies and microbes, to plants, birds, animals, and humans.” – p 47

Proverbs 22:29

Do you see someone skilled in their work? They will serve before kings; they will not serve before obscure men.

Colossians 3:23-24

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward; you are serving Christ.

Beauty

I walk with beauty before me

I walk with beauty behind me

I walk with beauty above me

I walk with beauty below me

I walk with beauty all around me

Your world is so beautiful, Oh God.

                                                -- Navajo prayer, quoted on page 49

A class member said it made her think of the poem attributed to St. Patrick: 

“Christ with me,
Christ before me,
Christ behind me,
Christ in me,
Christ beneath me,
Christ above me,
Christ on my right,
Christ on my left,
Christ when I lie down,
Christ when I sit down,
Christ when I arise,
Christ in the heart of every man who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks of me,
Christ in every eye that sees me,
Christ in every ear that hears me.”
― Saint Patrick

Which made me think of the Cosmic Christ.

1 Peter 3:3-4

3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

Discussion questions:

Any questions or things that struck you about the reading this week?

Where do you express creativity in your life?

What is an act of compassion you have witnessed recently?

What acts of compassion are you drawn to perform?

What is the feeling of beauty?

How do these relate?

We then took a meditative walk on the path around The Land holding the ideas of compassion, beauty, and creativity in our hearts!