Fear of the Darkness

Some seeds need light to germinate; others require darkness. At different points of our lives we have our own different needs. Usually we don't ask for or want the times of darkness, for we are afraid to falter. Afraid of getting lost. Afraid of what we cannot see.

When I taught outdoor education, we took the kids on a Night Hike. At one point we turned off the flashlights, stepped off the trail (we were all holding a rope), and sat in the dark forest. At first I felt discomfort. A sense of being unsure, wary. But then a sensation came over me: I felt cradled, held. I felt, in this utter darkness, seen. The forest saw me. The darkness saw me. In the darkness, I had nothing to prove and no one to be. It was just me and the velvety soft Love of Being.

In this time of germination, as our whole world asks who we are called to become, I wonder how the darkness can guide us. I do not relate to darkness as evil, but as a space for transmutation. Are we seeds that need the dark rich soil to transform? Can we trust the rope that keeps us connected to each other?

We sit in the Wisdom of where Christ guides us, not knowing where we are going. Not knowing who we will become. When he transitioned into a Being of Light destined to guide us, did He know? He knows now, but in this time of crucifixion and Easter, I have no sense at all. But then it isn't about me. It is about knowing that we are seen and held in the Darkness and the Light, and opening my heart to what He calls me to, even though I do not know what that is. Am I germinating or entering the cave of closing doors? I will not know until this time of life passes. 

Much love to you.

A Note from Rosemary Gladstar

Right after I published Sacred Land, I sent copies to the "sacred sisters" I profile in the book. I heard back from two of them: an email from Betsy Damon letting me know I had gotten some of my information a little wrong (she didn't, apparently, get muddy in the creek), and a lovely card from Rosemary Gladstar, which I tucked into her Family Herbal and cherish to this day. I was also in contact with Rebecca Dye, and she said she enjoyed the book. Maybe I'll do blog updates on all of them!

My card from Rosemary Gladstar

Going Slow, Going Within: Family Advent that Honors the Earth

Perhaps it's because my own life has been a roller coaster lately, or because it seems like the whole world is on the brink of utter insanity, but I've really dedicated myself to a calm and peaceful December this year. For me that means fewer gifts, local shopping, and doing crafts and baking when and if I want to. In the Christian faith, Advent (the days leading up to Christmas) is about waiting, pregnant, hopeful, but also with a little trepidation. Remembering to breathe. Honoring the light of those waiting with and for us. Lighting candles in the darkness. In the Pagan tradition, this time is about telling stories, watching the light wane further, and awaiting the return of the Light that we know will soon come. May this time of the year be about inner peace, wisdom, and connection with Spirit for you and your family. Here are a few ideas:

Painted snowflakes and a simpler holiday
season from The Artful Parent (I love this blog).

A gorgeous Yule coloring book for sale from LillianaPress. 

From a wise woman tradition on the Inner Christmas, some thoughts for meditation and journaling.

Sitting Dragonfly Vigil

Yesterday I stepped out back to pick a green onion for my breakfast, and discovered a dead dragonfly on the patio. I knelt down to pick him up and he began whirring his wings; he wasn't dead, just dying. I shooed the cat away and brought the beautiful blue and black creature into the house. I gave him a drop of water, which made his wings beat and his legs move. Clearly he couldn't fly anymore. I couldn't think of how to help him, and recalled that dragonflies don't live very long in their adult form. I could, however, make him safe from cats and other predators and give him a place of honor on my kitchen counter, holding the space for him as he passed into Light.

His eyes were like geometric blue opals. They had a depth to them, like a glass gem or a bead of water. My four-year-old remarked that the dragonfly's patterns on his body reminded him of a totem pole. I covered him with a bug-box lid so the cat wouldn't get him but he could breathe, and we left for our trip to the science museum.

When we returned, I thought he had passed, but when I touched him one leg moved. His opalescent eyes had turned a dull black from the top down, with just a crescent of blue at the bottom. I gave him Reiki, hoping it would ease his transition. While he was "just" a bug, he was fierce and beautiful, and I at least wanted to honor his slow death.

When he died, his eyes were completely black. You could literally see the life force leave him through his eyes.

I set him on my altar. Dragonfly is about illusion, and I am writing a book about Zen right now, which is all about the illusions we carry in our heads about life, about each and every thing we encounter. The problem is not that we live in illusion, it is that we think the illusion is "real." Dragonfly teaches us to hold the dichotomy of illusion and what we call reality. He teaches us about the illusion of life and death, and the dichotomy of death being real and final, and not.

I give thanks to the Universe for gifting me this honor of holding vigil while a beautiful Blue Eyed Darner. Aho.













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For more ways to live in harmony with the living earth,
check out my book Living Earth Devotional by Clea Danaan

Nature as Master Work, Nature as Path to God

By Clea Danaan 

There has been a perceived rift for thousands of years between the sacredness of nature and the holiness of higher realms, be that from a Christian perspective (heaven, the soul, etc. being better, pure, vs. nature and humanity being sinful/fallen) or a New Age perspective (the elevation of "spirituality" over matter). Pagans know the earth as sacred, but some reject the notion that there is anything beyond the material realm, flipping the Christian and New Age approaches (sometimes in response to a sense of emptiness and vagueness felt in a Christian upbringing).

I believe, as a Christian and a Pagan (if we need labels to get where I'm coming from), that both are true and not mutually exclusive: both "heaven" and earth are sacred and of God/dess. Furthermore, it's not a dichotomy at all, but a continuous, dynamic, intertwined relationship of sacred creation. But I haven't yet found original spiritual teachings that offer real language for this wholeness and support what I am trying to say. And certainly not from a Christian perspective. Green Christians don't tend to regard the earth as sacred of it's own merit, but simply as something to steward out of duty to God. But as a practitioner of what might be called Dark Green Christianity, I see the land as sacred by it's very existence (please see Dark Green Religion by Bron Taylor for a discussion of dark green religion, the notion that earth is sacred from within).

I'm reading Cynthia Bourgeault's The Meaning of Mary Magdalene, where she offers, via the Gospel of Mary Magdalene, Jesus' teachings on this very subject. The Gospel of Mary Magdalene is a 5th century text discovered in Cairo in 1896. It was hidden when, in 594, the church determined which texts should and should not be a part of the canonical Bible (what we consider to be the Bible today). It is the teachings of Jesus after his crucifixion, much like Acts in the canonical Bible. The teachings, presented in a dialogue form, fly right over the heads of many Christians, in both the early days of the church and now, so it was distrusted and discounted. Contemporary scholars like Bourgeault are just now beginning to understand it and share it's meaning and significance.

The teachings in this gospel refute the notion that "this world is an illusion, or fall, or error; or that its density places it at the tail end of the chain" of realms of being. "Rather, this world is good, worthy, and fully inhabited by the divine energies - 'the Good comes among you' - so long as it stays united with its root" (Bourgeault, 52). Jesus came to earth - "the Good comes among you" - "in order to reunite everything to its origin" (from the Gospel of Mary Magdalene, Bourgeault, 46). He teaches that sin arises when we fail to stay in alignment with this causal level origin (see Bourgeault, 48). About the causal realm, Jim Marion writes in Putting on the Mind of Christ, "This is the level of the Logos, the Eternal Word of God (John 1:1-3) through whom, as the firstborn of creation (Col. 1:15-20), all else of creation comes" (Marion, 184). The causal realm is the root of all, including the material world.

Jesus goes on to teach that we connect with the causal level - the root of all creation - through our heart, the organ of spiritual perception, an instrument of insight: "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God." (From a non-Christian perspective on the heart as an organ of psychic perception, see The Secret Teachings of Plants by Stephen Harrod Buhner.)

Jesus states, "All of nature with its forms and creatures exist together and are interwoven with each other" (Bourgeault, 46). By nature, he means the material world.

An artist paints to bring into the world a material form of a sense, a feeling. We can know this sense, and the artist, by stepping back from the painting and viewing it not from within the paint, but from a little distance, in order to see it's real nature. And often we use our eyes and our heart to do so.

Matter - nature - exists because of this higher causal level. It is, in other words, an expression or creation of the causal level (or rather of God, through the causal level). And we are here on this material plane to step back from the art work, if you will, in order to see it more clearly.We know God better through the forms and creatures of nature. And through our heart sensing of God as well as of nature.

Nature is, therefore, the most sacred of all master works, and needs to be treated accordingly. It is all sacred - as long as we stay centered and rooted in Source.Doesn't that just make you take a deep breath, settling into God within and without? As above, so below. Aho.

If this jumble of thoughts intrigues you, I highly recommend Cynthia Bourgeault's The Meaning of Mary Magdalene: Discovering the Woman at the Heart of Christianity as well as her Wisdom Jesus. Also Jim Marion's Putting on the Mind of Christ: The Inner Work of Christian Spirituality. Many Christians will find the ideas uncomfortable; others will find a sense of Yes! Non-Christians may find that the Christian approach is uncomfortable at first. If you are drawn to mysticism and wisdom traditions, stick with it. These are powerful texts that bring you to your center.

Divinity Within

Don't you love it when you find someone who "gets it"? In doing research for my current project, I discovered Dianne Sylvan's nonfiction works. Dianne is a Wiccan author who has an urban vampire series. She is also the author of The Circle Within and  The Body Sacred. The first is about the deeper spiritual aspects of Wicca, and the second is about the sacredness of the body. Good stuff.

I am a follower of the teachings of Mystical Christianity, Buddhism, and Wicca. So I appreciate how Sylvan includes (briefly) the former two paths in her understanding of Wicca. I particularly wanted to share this quote:

The point of Wicca, the real mystery behind it all, is to remember the Divinity within ourselves and all things; to manifest our God and Goddess all the time, every day, every moment; to love as They love, to give as They give; to serve Them in perfect trust, and thus bring Their grace more fully into the world; to understand that we are the embodiment of the Divine love and nurture, and to express that love in the world; to walk as God and Goddess. (The Circle Within, p 5)

Which is, interestingly, the point of wisdom (or mystical) Christianity. In The Wisdom Jesus, Episcopal priest Cynthia Bourgeault writes:

What [Jesus] has in mind is a complete, mutual indwelling: I am in God, God is in you, you are in God, we are in each other. His most beautiful symbol for this is in the teaching in John 15 where he says, "I am the vine; you are the branches. Abide in me as I in you." A few verses later he says, "As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you. Abide in my love." While he does indeed claim that "the Father and I are one" (John 10:30) -- a statement so blasphemous to Jewish ears that it nearly gets him stoned -- he does not see this as an exclusive privilege but as something shared by all human beings. ...There is no separation between humans and God because of this mutual interabiding which expresses the indivisible reality of divine love. We flow into God -- and God into us -- because it is the nature of love to flow. (p 31)

May your day be filled with the flow of love as you grow every closer to your own Divine self. Namaste!